Don's Walk Home.

"I like my music teacher." Thought Don as he walked home from his lesson. "She's always so happy and nice. She plays cool things for me on her piano. I don't like theory so much but when we draw thoes little circles thingys on the staff they remind me of pokeballs and that makes me happy. The other ones remind me of flags. :) . I remember at Christmas time she gave me chocolates and a cool pencil and she always gives me stickers." Don continued walking and thinking happy thoughts. He went down the trail and across the street and he remembered to look both ways like his mother had told him. But when he got across the street he found a dead bird laying on the sidewalk this made Don sad. Don decided to poke the bird with a stick he found on the ground but when he did the stick got stuck in the birds squishy carcas. Don picked up the bird on the stick and said to him "Your new name was George and were gonna be best friends forever." Don and George walked a few blocks and made small talk. They talked about the how bad the weather was and the recent stock market crash. Then they came to a house that had left it's yard clippings on the sidewalk. This put Don in a hulk like state of rage because yard clippings on the sidewalk is dons biggest pet peve. So Don took George and left him on the front steps and cursed the house as he walked away. By the time don had gotten around the corner he had already forgoten about the yard clippings on the sidewalk he had forgotten about his music teacher and everything she had just taught him. He had even forgotten his best friend George. In fact Don had almost forgotten everthing that had ever happened to him. All he could remeber was how to breath and how fast food gave him diahrea. Which were probably the two most important things for Don to remember.

Burger Ball Soldiers

When I arrived at work today my boss told me I had a new job and from then on I would be known as Pasta King which sounded like to important of a title for me so I knew I was in way over my head. He led me to a machine that was labled IMPASTA and I instantly thought this is not the real machine it's an impasta. I thought about saying that to my boss but I figured I spare him the bad joke and me the awkward silence. He went on to tell me I would be making fettichini noodles and all I had to do was break them off when they were about a foot long. He turned on the machine walked away and left me and the IMPASTA alone for some personal time. The noodles came out very slowly and reminded me of the dangling things in automatic carwashes. They were bunching up so I streched them out they were surprisingly warm and It felt like my fingers were in a little carwash. For some reason I liked the feeling and one of my coworkers must have noticed because he said "You don't have to touch th that much." To which I replied "I know" and went back to touching them I could tell he gave me a weird look. When I was all done with the IMPASTA I had to start rolling balls of meat for hamburgers. So I started rolling the balls and lining them up on a pan. After I was finished a few lines I looked at the balls they looked like little meat soldiers ready for battle. Then I thought about how they were going to get smashed into burgers and devoured. They were going to lose the battle and I got really disapionted with them and even angry. Each ball I made after that I cursed at in my head telling each one how much of a loser they were. As I thought deeper I realized that these burger balls have been losing all there lives. They started out as cows destined to die. Then they were slabs of meat thrown into a grinder. Now they are burger balls about to be smashed, grilled, and eaten. LOSERS all they're lives. But then my thoughts change I thought hey maybe one of these burgers will give someone food piosoning then they would finaly win the battle they were destined to lose. I began to have some pride in these little burger balls and I started giving the balls an encouraging speach I felt like William Wallace leading my small group of underdogs into battle. I started my speach telling each one of them "We may be small but we will come out victorious for if even just one of us I succesful in battle we all are succesful so go forth my little burger friends and never give up we will be victorious! WE WILL CONCOUR!!!" I started smashing the balls but the sound of the pan smashing the balls did not sound like another loss but a new beginning. I finished up my work, put the burgers in the fridge, and realized I really had become a King.

Jones

I was walking home from work thinking about how I haven't done laundry in awhile. I was feeling a little thirsty so I decided to stop at a convienence store and get a Jones. I got green apple because I had never had it before and it had a cool picture of a hobo feeding a squirel. I payed the lady at the front counter and said thank you and smiled. She smiled back and said something Asian that I didn't understand. Feeling slightly awkward from the Asian comment I headed the door Jones in hand. When I reached the door this creepy old lady appeard on the other side of the glass grabing the the handle at the exact moment I did. we both stared blankly at eachother trying to figure out who should open the door. Then she gave me a big smile so I opened the door and held it with one hand as she passed by me in the tight space. I finally got outside and opened my Jones. I read the fortune first as I always do and it read "catch up with various neglected chores." then I took a sip and it wasn't that great and I remembered a kid in my grade 5 class that ate flies.